This past Tuesday I was on the Staten Island Ferry, heading home after work, when I witnessed something so bizarre I questioned whether or not it was actuallyhappening.
It’s my custom to hang back a bit when the boat docksand let the mob of commuting Islanders and touristscram the gangways. No use being in the midst of sweaty and smelly humanity. I was in my usual spot at the snack bar (actually, that's a misnomer as I never eatthe “snacks” offered and only swill the tall-boyBuds—let’s call it simply “The Bar.”), watching the human pageantry go by. As the crowd thinned out, I spied this guy passing by. He appeared to be no olderthan 30. He was tall and stocky, with short brown hairand a kind of pock-marked face. Not ugly, just ordinary. He was garbed in a sharp charcoal grey business suit, white shirt (no tie), and luster fully shined black dress shoes. That’s not the extent of hiswardrobe, though. He wore over his suit a short-sleeved denim jacket. Not cut-off sleeves, mind you, but with regular hemshalfway down the upper arms. He had only a couple ofbuttons done up. The front of the jacket had all thesecolorful patches sewn on, like a Vietnam vet wouldhave on his denim vest.
I couldn’t scope out what thepatches said, but I followed him, hoping to find out this info. There were two patches on his back, each about four or five inches square, one up by each shoulder. They were representations of album covers.One was by Saxon, the other had the cover artwork forMetallica’s “Master of Puppets.”
As we neared the front of the boat, he veered off and inspected the contents of a garbage can. He withdrew from the receptacle a soda cup with lid and strawstill attached, a “large” one from the The Bar withthe Pepsi logo. This guy, whose nice suit was besmirched by denim, began sipping from the cup. I followed him out to the bus ramps (which I cutthrough to get to the SideStreet Saloon), hoping toget a gander at the front patches. He sipped from thesecond-hand, certified pre-owned soda cup the entireway. I lost him.
Weirdo or wack-job? You decide.(And I’m asking about HIM, not ME, all you weisenhemers!)
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I didn't feel like writing today--something is waaaaaaaaay off kilter. Thanks for pitching in, Drongo-baby.
ReplyDeleteI saw him on the ferry too! - it must have been the same day and was puzzled by the getup. The suit looked to be of good quality and fit pretty well so there was some money invested in it but couldn't figure out the jeans jacket either. And, you're right -- the weird sleeves gave it twice the odd look. Plus, it was a hot day so why would anyone put a jacket over a wool suit. Glad I missed the dumpster diving for drinks though.
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