Tips on Getting Laid, Part 4.1 Initial Encounters with the Hot

When we last left our hero, whose face was half-eaten off by a tiger, was going to encounter a lovely lady with a very large, beautiful, pair of...feet. He was very nervous, and afraid he was going to just go over there, say something stupid, and drool all over her...feet.

But he's not going to do that. This guy is going to do something else. He is going to be "cool." Being cool is a head game you play with your own head, and not anyone else's, and it has nothing to do with aloofness, Tom Cruise, or sunglasses.

There are only four principles to being cool:
1. You are your own person--even if you are tied up and forced to eat shit for 90 days, no one owns your mind.
2. No one is better than you. Maybe richer, maybe more famous or beautiful or glamorous. But no one is better. So you kowtow to no one!!! If someone more beautiful or whatever is making you nervous, picture him or her sitting on the toilet, making constipated faces. It happens to everyone.
3. A lot of people, in some way or another, are worse off than you. Have some compassion, and try to make the people around you (whether they are smart, dumb, beautiful, etc.) feel comfortable with you.

So, now our guy goes over to our girl, with all that in mind, perhaps running all those rules over and over in his head, to try to stay calm. (That does help.) How does he know that she's into him?

Body language! There are a lot of good books on body language out there. But here are the basics on how to tell if people are attracted to you:
1. They make eye contact.
2. They lean toward you.
3. They respond to you in an animated way (a lot of talking and laughing).
4. They keep their body open (no arms or legs crossed) and turned toward you.
5. They try to touch you in a casual way (maybe your arms; it may seem accidental).
6. They talk to you about relationships or sex, directly or indirectly.

OK, now our guy does have that whole tiger-ate-part-of-his-face problem. He may not get positive body language at first. Does that mean he should give up? No. If it wasn't a recent injury, he should be used to being winced at by now. But he's cool, right?

Tiger guy approaches Feet girl. She winces. He notices this body language. He tries to make her feel comfortable (cool rule 3) with his looks by making a joke. "Oh, my Phantom of the Opera mask is out for a polish today." Maybe she laughs, nervously. He makes a comment about the game, to strike up a real conversation.

If this works, and they do have a real conversation, he should ask her for a very casual meeting outside the venue right away, before the whole stupid crush thing can develop. A very casual date is a beer, or coffee, at a time when either of them can disappear nicely if it all goes south. Lunch is good. Happy hour is good, too. No dressing up, no wondering what'll happen. The less drama the better.

If it doesn't work out, and she just walks away, tells him she has a boyfriend/girlfriend/husband, etc., she's been ruled out without too much time lost on a dead end.