The Tiny Population

At my work email box, I received one with the subject line: Why so small weenie? [sic]
And it went like this:

Greet man

I don't care why your meat is so small, but 70% of women do.
They are pretty sure that bigger member will make their desire
stronger. You have the chance to change your life.

Here http://xzslhg.com you can get the thing.

It will help you for sure.
The remedy can be sent worldwide.
If you wont be satisfied - we will return all you money.
No bullshit.

In a way, I feel bad for men. They have a lot of their ego put into something that may or may not work. Or only works when the chemistry is right. Later on in life, they are pretty sure it will stop working most of the time. You could say that women have a similar problem--with breast size or physical appearance in general. But if we feel bad enough to need breast implants, we know that if we buy them, they really will work--the breast size really will increase. Whatever tiger penis shavings they're selling at xzslhg.com probably won't.

I've heard there are men out there who just have tiny (smaller than 3.5")penises. I've never encountered any. They must be a minute portion of the population. What happens to those guys, I wonder.

An End to the Death Penalty

America is at an all time low for executions. Great. But we are still wasting tons of money on judges, lawyers, executioners, etc. I don't think people who are in for horrible crimes are worth my tax dollars. I have a new solution: the re-institution of slavery. I'm not talking about horrible, horrible spirit-killing stuff. Just to make the people in jail to work as hard as our grandparents and great-grandparents worked. For no pay. (Just like the immigrant great grandparents.)
I mean, wouldn't it just take the coolness out of jail if no one had the time to work out, etc., but instead had to work as farmers and as shoe-factory employees for fifteen hours a day for the rest of their lives? And if you misbehave, you get worse: cleaning bathrooms, sewers, etc. Everyone should be too tired to even consider rape.
I suppose if the system worked well enough, it could pay for itself--or even pay America back for the money we've already wasted.

35 till I'm 85.

At 35, I've finally started to see a couple of smile lines around my mouth, and said that's enough already. I want to look 35 until I'm 80. I looked on the Dr. Denese web site--her stuff is supposed to be the best: the highest concentration of vitamins, etc. Her stuff is also complicated. There's a list a mile long, with no pre-made "packs" for people in their 30's, 40's, 70's, whatever. Each product is also at least $30. Then I went looking on Q&A boards. Intelligent people seemed to be talking about going DIY, but they didn't site sources of info. With my skills at chemistry DIY, I'd probably end up making LSD instead of anti-oxident cream.

I chronicled this problem to my friend Donna, and she sent me an uncomplicated, but complete answer:

Hi Suki!
Ah...the lines and their prevention issue. You have mentioned this to the right person. My skin has been a small (read:huge) obsession since I was oh, eleven.
I have tried many products for many things (anti-acne, anti-wrinkle, line prevention, pore minimizers).
Consumer Reports came out with a big study the other day saying a lot of stuff out there, especially the expensive stuff, doesn't do a lot BUT did say the best stuff out there is the Olay Regenerist line.
I've used that- go for the serum and/or the cream, but forget the "lotion". I used something else recently that purported to impart "glow" and I WAS glowy; I ran out and intend to get more although I can't remember the name of the product. 99% sure it was Olay something but I'll know it when I see it in the store.
The general consensus among magazine articles interviewing dermatologists is that you want something with either retinol or Vitamin C for prevention. Retinol can be a little irritating at first and you need to use sunblock every day because it makes your skin more sensitive to sunlight.
Actually THAT's the number 1 prevention item right there : SUNBLOCK.
So, on the basis of my vast experience with many products and ridiculously expensive quest for good skin, I believe in serious (35-50 SPF) but cheap sunblock slathered on in the morning and some kind of retinol/Vitamin C serum topped with a moisturizer cream at night.
Oh, and also note that most line minimizers take about 6-8 weeks of use to see a difference, so don't give up if whatever you try doesn't seem to do much right away.

Denise

I started exercising not too long ago. Probably about 3 months now, and I've really noticed a change in my body. Richard Simmons has gotten too easy, unless I turn every knee bend into a deep squat, and add a hop every chance I can. But I didn't have Richard when I first began exercising. All I had was an old Denise Austin tape from 1986.
I hate that tape. It's from the early days of aerobics, so all it is is Denise running in place and waving her arms around different ways. For the first few weeks I would feel like throwing up after I was done with it. When I exercised, I would imagine she was a puppet. I would swear at her, say I hated her.
Then I discovered my library had a huge exercise collection, so I started doing those instead, leaving Denise as my "punishment" tape--punishment for not having the forethought to get something better at the library. Believe me, I did not revisit it for quite some time.
Then one morning, all I had was Denise and a Harry Potter movie. I put them on, side by side, (yes, on two tv's!)and worked out. The Denise exercises were easy, and I followed them out of the corner of my eye. Maybe because it was from the corner of my eye, I noticed this:

Poor Denise! Her '80's hair is all sticking up wrong, she's staggering about, her hand movements all limp and uncontrolled. And I felt really bad. I don't know how many takes it took to do this one half hour of film, but it looks like they ran her ragged--and I started to wonder if I were in better shape now than she was then, even with my beer gut.

Do Women Have the Moral High Ground?

Last night, after several drinks with my boyfriend, I said I was going home. He said he was going to his usual watering hole for another beer before he went home. I must've expressed surprise (he had just said an hour before that if there were no bar from the bar to the ferry, he probably wouldn't drink hardly at all), because he asked me, "What, do you think that's morally wrong?"

No one puts the word "moral" and "you" (meaning me) in the same sentence. Ethical, yes. Because it implies something more open than the sort of biblical "good" that "moral" implies.

And then I put pi x r2 together and saw the whole picture. In shock, I called my best friend for advice. "Charles! My boyfriend thinks I'm his moral compass!"

Charles said that was quite common. He said he feels that way about his new wife. I said, first of all, that I'm not Christian. My idea of being good is being more of one's self and bad being less of one's self. So, if being a drunk is who you really are, that's who I want you to be (though I think that's not necessarily what I'm looking for in a long term relationship). And besides, making a woman (or anyone) your moral compass is really dangerous. "Women aren't more "good" than men. They are just more conniving and sneakier about their--their--"

"Evil-ness?"

"Yes."

Charles promised to be careful. You be more careful, too.

Sexual Positioning Furniture

The chair and the swing look the most interesting for the brave folks who don't have children asking what those contraptions are in the bedroom. The "liberator" stuff looks like it might be good for people with lower back problems. To see the whole site, click here.

You probably should click there, it will get you past disclaimers a mile long. I don't want to think about injuries on some of these things.

Sex in Shape

My boyfriend was horrified to hear that sex had gotten better "since I started working out." He loves me for my mind of course. Who else can go from talking about comics with gorilla covers to condoms in less than two sentences? (And don't you wish you were around for that conversation?) But I have noticed a difference, not only all the new moves I can do but how long I can do them and how fast and aggressive I can be. He feels like he gets in deeper--can't be that much deeper! I haven't lost that much weight. The most important part for me is the difference in the way he touches me. His caresses are more aggressive and firm, a real turn-on for me. It's not a conscious change for him, but we're both still just animals, and physical appearance is still an interaction, whether we find that "shallow" or not: we still see and are seen, and that in itself is a love affair.